The Tenth Life

It was this plentiful that was suffocating her. air air air. There was plenty of it. She was suffocating on this excess. With her face down in the pillow, she could restrict it. Let the air in more slowly. Let the lack of air make her gasp. Then swallow huge gulps that came rushing back. It wouldn’t stay away. It wouldn’t stay away.

Here she could see the air. It had got into every corner of the room. Uninvited. With the smell of the road outside and the blurry sun. They all came marching in and sat stubbornly in the shabby corners of her crowded room. She glared back with dark eyes swollen with heavy tears. But they refused to leave.

And they refused to listen to her. She wanted just enough so that she could rub some into those weary limbs. That tired chest.

Later she ran around, trying to catch a few in her graceless hands. A gust here. A waft there. They stopped and settled on her palm just for a moment before slipping off on to the floor. They scuttled around on their stumpy feet. Always too fast for her. The cracks she had never seen before swallowed and hid them. Till she crouched on the floor too exhausted to run after them.

Then they did come out. Cautiously. Circling around her squatting body but not coming too close. She had held her hand out helplessly. But they had refused. Again.

On the other side, she knew someone was waiting. She had promised. But yet again she couldn’t do it. Another night will go by like this. Excess and want playing practical jokes on their tired bodies. And they would both choke, together.